Understanding the Stages of Grief
After your loved one’s cremation services in St. Johns, OH., you may experience feelings of pain and loss that feel unbearable. These feelings are normal, and while time does help, that old adage doesn’t help much in the moment. What can help is knowing and understanding the stages of grief so that you can better understand what you are feeling and what may be coming next.
Although there are some main stages of grief, it’s important to know that everyone will experience them differently. For example, some people may stay in one stage longer than another, or skip a stage altogether. Also, the order that people go through may be different. It’s important to focus on your own healing and not compare it to others as the way we handle our grief is very individualized.
Denial
This is typically the first stage people experience. When we lose someone we love, especially if it was sudden, it may take a little while for our brains to truly comprehend they are really gone. We may logically know they are no longer with us but still feel as if they may come through the front door at any moment.
People in this stage may say things like “I’m fine” or “nothing is wrong”. They may also keep themselves busy and distracted with other things so that they don’t have to face this new reality.
Anger
Anger can be a difficult stage to get through. People in this stage may feel angry at themselves, the universe or God, or even their loved one who has passed. The anger they feel may come out in aggressive ways such as starting fights or arguments or be expressed as pessimism or cynicism.
People in this stage my feel anger but also experience feelings of being out of control, rage, or even impatience. There is a risk in this stage for an increase in drug and alcohol use so that is something to watch for.
Bargaining
This stage consists of thoughts and statements such as “If I only…” or “I should have…”. People in this stage can have people feeling emotions such as blame, guilt, insecurity, and even fear. They may relive the past moments and wondered what they could have done differently. They may also make deals with the universe or God such as “If you just let me heal from this pain I promise to be a kinder person”.
Depression
The stage that most people are familiar with is depression. In this stage you may notice a lack in energy or motivation, reduced social interest and changes in sleep patterns. You may also see crying and an increase in drug or alcohol use. This stage is a normal part of the grieving process, however, people must be careful not to stay here too long. If you or someone you know is having a difficult time with this stage, make sure to reach out for help.
Acceptance
Acceptance is the final stage. This is when the reality of everything is truly realized and the feelings of grief have been mostly processed and worked through. Acceptance doesn’t mean that everything is okay and people feel wonderful again, it simply means, they can begin to see a life for themselves that is set in this new reality.
If you would like more information about cremation services in St. Johns, OH. or help with the stages of grief, please contact us anytime as we are always here to help.
